Empathy in the Classroom? Who Would've Thunk?

Bend the Rules Sometimes Rules are best when they are for the greatest good. Bend if necessary and call it empathy. Has anyone anywhere ever bent the rules for you just when you truly needed it? Has anyone ever understood your situation and eased up on a rule? Or has everyone around you always been super rigid, and you just cannot get a break?

The Science I Explored Not only does empathy shape your relationships with those around you, it’s an important part of our evolutionary history. Humans have always been social animals, and even some of our earliest ancestors – like the australopithecines, a shared ancestor of humans and apes, who lived 2 million years ago – had defined social structures. Empathy helps us organize into societies and may have evolved along with shared child rearing to help us survive as a species. Our capacity for empathy is hardwired into our brains, thanks in part to special brain cells called mirror neurons. Mirror neurons fire both when you perform an action and when you see someone else perform it (though the latter happens on a smaller scale). They help you “feel” what someone else is experiencing on some level, even if you’re not experiencing it yourself. While empathy might be hard-wired into your brain, not everyone experiences empathy the same way. Disruptions in one brain region (the right supramarginal gyrus, which is found in the parietal lobe at the top and back of your brain) can make you more likely to project your emotions onto others – so instead of picking up what they are feeling, you think they feel what you feel. That naturally makes it more difficult to empathize, since you’re not really observing others’ intent or feelings. Your material circumstances can change the way you feel empathy, too. When researchers looked at differences in empathy in people of different socioeconomic classes, they found that richer people tended to be less empathetic. And other scientists have found that underlying biases – like negative attitudes about race, gender or religion – can shape how we extend empathy to different groups. The research shows that as you get to know people with different experiences and backgrounds, you’ll naturally start to feel more empathetic to a broader range of people.[1]

A Situation Timeliness counts as part of the student grade. Preparedness is reflected on the student’s progress report. Class participation counts for a chunk of the overall grade as well. But you have students who are great academically, who are also late and sometimes unprepared. Their lateness and unpreparedness are now about to considerably lower their grade. But their ability to be on time is connected to their parent who works nights. This also impacts the student’s ability to be prepared with school supplies.

Bending Classroom Rules When we bend the rules, we are really looking at empathy. Yes, there are some rules we need to keep firm for the physical and emotional safety of everyone in the room. But there are other instances where we can feel and show empathy for a fellow human being. Look at something simple, like lateness to class. Ask about reasons for lateness. Offer a solution: Sometimes children can help parents by being independent in the mornings. Think of other possible ways to help after hearing reasons for lateness. Talk to parents and offer help. “When Janey is late, she misses…. Is there a way I can help?” Create an in-class grace period, like a minireview or a quick educational game. For class participation, create opportunities, like assigning roles (also referred to as accountable talk) in small groups and during partner work. That opportunity allows you to give points because you have now observed the children participating in accountable talk. When it comes to school supplies, ask about supplies and keep stashes of schools supplies so children can have access to the basics, like writing tools, paper, and rulers. No, don’t go to the supply store grumbling and complaining, trying to buy everything for your students. Just donate what you can (if its 1 pack of pencils, it's still a wonderful act) to your classroom and be fine with your donation. Say it with me: “Child, let me understand you.” Now, can you see the relief in the eyes of the students you helped?

Quotes

Principals and rules are intended to provide a thinking man with a frame of reference.

—Carl von Clausewitz

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?

—Henry David Thoreau

[1] Sylvie Tremblay, “Your Brain On: Empathy,” Sciencing, Updated August 10, 2018, https://sciencing.com/your-brain-on-empathy-13714004.html.